"answers and questions"
Thursday, June 14, 2007 Filed in: my life
so, i've been getting
many questions and since i put you (whoever you might
be) through reading the break-up blogs way back in
November and December, i think it's only fair to let
you in on what's up now.
in February and March, Stacy and i started talking about what went wrong with us. there were a lot of unanswered questions and there was a huge lack of closure. since we were broken up and had no plans for anything other than that, we were able to be brutally honest with each other. the more we talked, the more we realized that we had a lot of misunderstandings and miscommunications. some of them went all the way back to when we first met.
over the last few months, i've learned a lot about Stacy and about myself. i've learned a lot about us and where we've been and what we've been through and how that has affected us. as this went on, there came a point where it seemed like we needed to either do something with our newfound knowledge and understanding, or go our seperate ways for good. since we clearly haven't done a good job of figuring pretty much anything out for ourselves over the past few years, we decided that we should use what we've learned and see if it would make a difference while we also got ourselves some counseling to see if we could continue what we'd started.
is it different? yes. it's actually very different. it's the best of what we had before and a lot of what we'd both wished we'd had. is it perfect? of course not. it's us.
next week, we start counseling. this is just something that makes sense to me. (why do people wait until they're engaged to do premarital counseling? it's like announcing to the world "we're gonna get married!" and then going to find out if it's a good idea or not. dumb.) obviously, Stacy and i are not at the "getting married" point, but we'd both like to get closer to figuring out whether that's right for us or not.
anyway, i know that some of you will have very definite opinions on this. i know what they are and i appreciate any concerns you might have, but i'm also well aware of them already and don't need to hear it from you. so, i'm gonna ask that we go with the "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all" rule on this one.
thank you for being supportive and caring. it's been a very interesting/emotional/crazy/unexpected period of time, but i definitely think that God is teaching both Stacy and i a lot of great things.
love and peace (or else),
matt
in February and March, Stacy and i started talking about what went wrong with us. there were a lot of unanswered questions and there was a huge lack of closure. since we were broken up and had no plans for anything other than that, we were able to be brutally honest with each other. the more we talked, the more we realized that we had a lot of misunderstandings and miscommunications. some of them went all the way back to when we first met.
over the last few months, i've learned a lot about Stacy and about myself. i've learned a lot about us and where we've been and what we've been through and how that has affected us. as this went on, there came a point where it seemed like we needed to either do something with our newfound knowledge and understanding, or go our seperate ways for good. since we clearly haven't done a good job of figuring pretty much anything out for ourselves over the past few years, we decided that we should use what we've learned and see if it would make a difference while we also got ourselves some counseling to see if we could continue what we'd started.
is it different? yes. it's actually very different. it's the best of what we had before and a lot of what we'd both wished we'd had. is it perfect? of course not. it's us.
next week, we start counseling. this is just something that makes sense to me. (why do people wait until they're engaged to do premarital counseling? it's like announcing to the world "we're gonna get married!" and then going to find out if it's a good idea or not. dumb.) obviously, Stacy and i are not at the "getting married" point, but we'd both like to get closer to figuring out whether that's right for us or not.
anyway, i know that some of you will have very definite opinions on this. i know what they are and i appreciate any concerns you might have, but i'm also well aware of them already and don't need to hear it from you. so, i'm gonna ask that we go with the "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all" rule on this one.
thank you for being supportive and caring. it's been a very interesting/emotional/crazy/unexpected period of time, but i definitely think that God is teaching both Stacy and i a lot of great things.
love and peace (or else),
matt